Bowling with the Crew
by Skittows
Summary: Kise is bored and Kuroko is sick of hearing his annoying voice complain. With nothing else to do, the bluenette thinks of a plan to stop his ears from bleeding! Will bowling be another sport the GoM are gifted in? Sort of a crack, rated T for language. Random fluffs later on.
1. The Idea

**A/N:**

**So guys, I'm back with another fic! I haven't written anything since last year because 1) I lost my fandom and 2) writer's block. I know no one reads these author notes but please leave a review to tell me what you think about it! It will be much appreciated! **

**btw this fic is somewhat a crack but whatever. **

I DO NOT OWN KNB OR ANY OF IT'S CHARACTERS, I ONLY OWN THIS FICTIONAL STAY BASE ON THEM. KNB SOLELY BELONGS TO THE RIGHTFUL OWNER.

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CHAPTER 1: The Idea

"Kurokocchi!" Kise drawled for the tenth time just before pouting and slouching himself back onto Kuroko's living room's amazingly comfy sofa.

"What?" Kuroko, the bluenette reading a book and sitting next to the couch Kise was sitting in, reluctantly replied, because he knew he'd hear the same thing over and over again, like a broken record. The only solution is to give the blonde what he wants.

"I'm bored!" The blonde complained some more, forcing blood to rush into Kuroko's ears because he couldn't take it anymore.

Right now, the bluenette would rather rake his eyes out than hear another complain from his blonde friend inside of his own house.

"Why did I even have the guts to invite him inside in the first place?" He thought to himself, pissed, "I knew it was a good way to ruin my fucking morning."

"What's that, Kurokocchi? Is something in your mind?" The blonde asked but only this time, less annoyingly.

"My mind! That's it!" Kuroko said out loud, surprising the blonde.

Suddenly, the bluenette jumped out of the sofa just after gently placing his book on the coffee table (because he cares about every single one of them) and strutted back and forth with his hand firmly implanted onto his pale chin.

Unfortunately, the blonde couldn't comprehend the situation. When he's supposed to see a teen trying to brainstorm, what he sees is his blue-haired friend is going AWOL.

"Kurokocchi did you forget to take your meds again?" The worried blonde assumed just before getting out of his seat and searching every cabinet in the living room to find Kuroko's so-called medication.

"Shut up, Kise-kun, I'm thinking." Kuroko replied quickly yet blandly, as always.

A relieved sigh came from the blonde and stopped looking for meds. Once he took a seat on the same sofa he left his buttmarks in, he began to chat some more, throwing Kuroko off his A-game.

"So, what are you thinking of, me?" Kise babbled and teased annoyingly.

"SHUT UP! I'M TRYING TO THINK OF WAYS FOR YOU TO SHUT UP!" He replied brutally honestly, almost making Kise shed a tear from all the damage in his heart that was left to be stitched by himself.

"So mean, Kurokocchi!"

Kuroko totally ignored the fact that Kise just called him mean and kept riding his train of thought like a great friend he is.

Suddenly, the train came to a stop. It hit him! A perfect idea!

"Oh, I know! Let's go bowling!" Kuroko snapped his fingers while announcing.

"Really? That's a great ide-" Kise was cut off by the bluenette.

"But you're paying for the bowling shoes and shit." Kuroko said in a brash tone.

"So mean, Kurokocchi! I work hard for this cash and you know that!" The blonde reasoned, trying to get away with it.

"Sure male barbie, if by working hard you mean smiling at the camera with a pound of make-up on and a pack of mucky clothes no one would actually wear in real life, then I totally agree with you." He replied with those disgustingly empty and soulless eyes.

"So mean, Kurokoc-"

Once again, Kise was cut off by the bluenette again. But, only this time he was texting people. The Generation of Miracles to be precise.

"I'm gonna invite the others over so that I won't have a hard time dealing with you. Alone on my own." Kuroko announced bluntly while texting his other friends on his cheap little blue Samsung S3.

"Great! Just invite Akashicchi over so he'll be the one to pay!" Kise happily suggested, thinking he could get away with it for real this time.

Kuroko had suddenly gained a fearful expression. His pupils dilated, his sweat turned cold, his body started to shake in fear just thinking about what Kise just suggested to him.

The scared bluenette turned around, grabbed Kise in the shoulders and said with his morning breath (which really got the best of Kise and knocked his senses a little):

"Kise-kun, by telling him to do that over the phone, you know he'll completely disagree and kill us both in our sleep!"

The two gulped in unison as they both imagined a scenario wherein a familiar-looking redhead slits their throats when all the lights are out.

"Fine." Kise replied after getting a hold of himself. Shivers were still mingling up and down his spine. "But why am I the one who's gonna pay for all this expensive stuff? Why can't you pay?" He added, a little pissed this time.

"Do you wanna go bowling with the crew or not?" Kuroko replied as if he was a big shot or something.

"Yes, I do. But why can't you pa-"

"Because I don't want to. Now let's put or best clothes on and meet up with the rest at the bowling alley."

Kise sighed before nodding. He had to listen to Kuroko, no matter how high the reluctance, because it's the only way for him to destroy his boredom once and for all.

Kuroko got out of his seat, while Kise seemed to sit still and look glum.

"Goodbye, walletcchi." The blonde said just before standing up from his seat.

Once he was up, he felt his pockets, in search for his wallet.

Kise panicked as soon as he felt no bump in his jeans.

"Wh-where is it?! Where could it be?!" He began to react nervously, with sweat dripping down from every pore of his forehead.

Kuroko turned back, not knowing what the fuss was all about until he saw his blonde friend panic while feeling his pants.

"Kise-kun, what's wrong? Aren't you gonna dress up in my room with me- I mean... Kise-kun is something of the matter?" Kuroko asked with a droplet of expression.

"K-Kurokocchi. My wallet's missing!" Kise shouted in panic.

"Oh, you mean this?" Kuroko took out the brown leather square from his very own PJ pockets and wobbled it around in the air lightly, showing it off as it was out of reach for Kise, because the blue-eyed was surely a good 4 meters away from him and a good 1 meter to his bedroom door. "I took it from you the moment you weren't looking with the use of misdirection because I was afraid you wouldn't actually pay for all six of us." He added, explaining bluntly his reasons.

"So mean, Kurokocchi!"

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**So, should I continue it or...? Please leave a review! Much appreciated! Thanks for reading :D**


	2. The Visitors

**A/N:**

**So guys, I'm back again! Thanks for all the follows, faves, at reviews! I'm sorry the update took too long. It's because internet was being a dick, that's why I couldn't reply to your wonderful reviews either. (=o_o=) (T_T) Here's another chapter of bowling! I hope you enjoy!**

I DO NOT OWN KNB OR ANY OF IT'S CHARACTERS, I ONLY OWN THIS FICTIONAL STAY BASE ON THEM. KNB SOLELY BELONGS TO THE RIGHTFUL OWNER.

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CHAPTER 2: The Visitors

"Kise-kun," Kuroko said blandly, still wobbling the wallet with a wad of cash in the air making Kise sweat in fear not knowing what the bluenette would do to his cold-hard cash.

"I'll give this back to you..."

The blonde gulped.

"If you promise to never come over to my house again." Kuroko continued, making Kise cry.

"Kurokocchi! That's so hard!" Kise whined.

"Do you want your wallet back or not?" The bluenette began to get inpatient.

"Okay fine! I promise." The blonde reluctantly agreed.

"Promise what?"

"I promise to never go to your house again." The blonde stated firmly, but held his tears back. "Now can I have my wallet back?"

Before Kuroko even bothered giving it back to his blonde friend, he suddenly struck a pose just after holding his beastly smile; a pose that would haunt Kise until the day he dies.

"Tres bien!" Shouted the bluenette while perfectly imitating the stature of the purple-haired male from Tokyo ghoul (Tsukiyama). Kise was left in shock. He froze in time, his bones trembled in fear, his jaw became locked in position, and his eyes were cautiously wide open. Kise was glued, even when the doorbell rang.

"Ooh! Someone's coming over!" Kuroko said cheerfully, still not over his exuberant joy of listening to the words that came out of Kise's very own mouth: ""I promise to never go to your house again".

The bluenette broke his pose but still packed his face with him and waltzed towards the living room to get the door.

Slowly opening it, he still kept that hideous smile on his face.

On Kuroko's porch stood Midorima, his lucky item, and Akashi.

"We came as soon as we could, nanodayo." Was what the carrot said.

"Midorima-kun. Ohayou." Kuroko greeted formally, which gave Midorima the creeps considering he still had that eerie smile on his face.

"Baka." The green-haired teen replied, but Kuroko couldn't even reply back because he was a little too bedazzled by the lucky item sitting on MIdorima's hand.

"Midorima-kun," he said, "Is that...?"

The lucky item glimmered upon the reflection and blinded his eyes for a moment, forcing Kuroko to squint a bit.

"Yes, it's a bowling ball." Midorima answered before Kuroko could finish his sentence. What the megane had in his hand was a very shiny bowling ball the same shade of his hair that seemed to be fresh from the store. It even has the price tag still attached to it.

"And it's...?" Kuroko asked some more.

Midorima fixed his glasses just before answering his obvious questions again. "Yes, it coincidentially happened to be the Oha-Asa's lucky item of the day."

Kuroko smiled even more creepily, for he was very excited to play bowling and "borrow" Midorima's green ball.

"Take that thing off your face, Tetsuya." Akashi ordered, slowly forcing to bring down the smile upon Kuroko's cheeks with his fingers. "It doesn't suit you."

Even after the slightly faded away smile, Midorima knows what he was thinking of just by looking at his fucking sick face.

"BAKA! THIS FUCKER OF A BOWLING BALL ISN'T INTENDED FOR PLAYING USES! nanodayo." He shouted defensively, twisting his body so that both of his arms protected his lucky item from behind and away from Kuroko's reach. Kuroko reacted to Midorima's defensive stance by raising his arms up as if he had no intentions on snatching the ball away from its daddy.

"No harm done, bro." Kuroko replied innocently, making Midorima look assuming.

Once the argument was over, there was a moment of awkward silence. But of course, it was broken by Teiko's former team captain.

"What's wrong with Ryouta?" Asked Akashi who insantly saw the blonde behind Kuroko who looked a little frightened.

"Oh, nothing. He just saw me strike a pose."

The bluenette replied and easily slipped away from them knowing that he was the cause of Kise's nightmares.

"And why are you two still in your PJs?" Akashi asked formally. He was a bit dissapointed in Kuroko for sending him such a lie of a text. "I mean, what's this supposed to even tell me?" He added before showing Kuroko the message on his red HTC just after unlocking its 10-digit passcode.

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_**To:**__ Me, Shintaro (green dick), Atsushi (tall dick), Daiki (black dick)_

_**From:**__ Tetsuya (light blue dick)_

_dressed up and ready to go!_

_hey who wants to go bowling w me and kise? (^_^)_

_kises payin!_

_gm_

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"Hey! What's 'light blue dick' supposed to mean?" The bluenette whined like a kid but with his poker face, which was really a sight to see.

"Ugh..." The redhead facepalmed because that was not the message he was trying to tell him. "Read the message."

Suddenly, it came to Kuroko. His style really was something - douchey to say the least.

"I- Uh... I don't know what's the problem...?" Kuroko stuttered but still kept his game face. Akashi easily became pissed and popped a vein.

He sighed.

He closed his eyes.

He concentrated.

He opened them.

He triggered his Emperor Eye.

His eyes became a bolder color of 'blood orange' and 'amber'. Fierce.

He was still standing on the porch beside Midorima and his bowling ball, but Kuroko was instantly down on his ass.

He sighed. Again.

He leaned down to make eye contact with the bluenette who just got 'ankle broken'.

He didn't blink.

Kuroko shivered.

He pointed at his screen, his finger exactly on the location the of sentence: "dressed up and ready to go!"

"Do you fucking see this?" He whispered inside of Kuroko's ear, spit drops suddenly all around it. Kuroko could hear the echoes reverb inside of his ear tunnels, causing his pupils to shrink. "What do you have to say for yourself and your PJs, Tetsuya?"

"Akashi-kun..." Kuroko whispered with fear, as he was overwhelmed by Akashi's gruesome aura.

"Yes, Tetsuya?"

"Your screen went off." Kuroko said soullesly as he stared at the black screen.

"Shit." The momentum was ruined. Akashi's aura suddenly went blank. He was completely humiliated. It was all over. "Forget it." The redhead added while standing up. "I'm

just trying to tell you that you're a dick for lying. No one lies to me. Know your place beyotch."

Kuroko was suddenly being pointed at by Akashi who was nagging him down to the bone.

"Look, you guys just came too early." Kuroko stood back up will dusting himself off.

"That's what she said!" Was what Midorima said in the background, which got him an elbow from the redhead.

"I didn't even have time to prepare myself." The bluenette reasoned, "I mean, it's like you guys just came from around the corner."

"It's not my fault I can see the future." Akashi replied, trying to win the argument.

"Okay, you know what? How about you two come inside, make yourselves at home, wait for the others to come by, and do your thing while I go prepare myself." The bluenette planned out, which the two agreed to.

Both Midorima and Akashi took their shoes off, went inside, sat on the couches, and waited for the others. Midorima unluckily took Kise's assprint seat while Akashi took Kuroko's cold seat which contained zero assprints. The bowling ball stayed sitting on Midorima's hand.

"Wait..." Akashi ordered, causing Kuroko to halt right when he was inches away from his room. "What about Ryouta?"

"Psh! Don't worry, he's a model. PJs will be the new thing when people see him bowling in them." Kuroko swatted away and went straight to his room to dress up.

Suddenly...

Awkward silence.

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**Thanks again for reading! Leaving a review would be deeply appreciated! Sorry if I can't reply to them... :P**

**Also, following and favoriting would help a lot!**

_May the rainbow be ever in your color,_

**_\- Skittows_**


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